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Michael's avatar

Heavens and Earth and their whole order finished

["finished" sounds like Qal, but it is Pual, passive of "finished" in the next line]

He finished

that seventh day

the work

He’d done [I like this way of phrasing it]

He rested [the implication of "Sabbath" here seems to important to ignore]

that seventh day

from work ["from all the work" after "blessed" really belongs here, no?]

He’d done

He blessed

the seventh day

from all work

He consecrated it

for ceasing [implicitly; but the text says He consecrated it BECAUSE he had ceased]

from work

God had made [seems important to distinguish ברא from עשה, no?]

for doing. [I guess you deliberately saved "God" for here?]

In general I'm not yet understanding the mix of Buber-Rosenzweig-Fox literalism and creative freedom you're trying to achieve. E.g., "He'd done" is very colloquial; "from work" is neither literal nor standard English, and the two phrases sit awkwardly together for me. Perhaps I had better read the "Why & How" entry before saying more!

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